Life’s Intentions and Goals (previously called Baby Bucket List)

2011

Babies and I have never really made a great pair.  I guess I’ve never really thought about them much since I was more focused on getting through so many years of schooling and my work.  Living the early years of my adult life in urban areas where I saw very few kids didn’t help either.  Until recently, it had been YEARS since I even held a baby!

But now that it has been quite a few years since graduation, I’m in a good place in my career and I’m now finally married, it only comes naturally to think that little footsteps should be running around in our too-big-for-just-two house on a hill.  Since B and I just got married less than a year ago, there are still travels we would like to accomplish before we start thinking about expanding our family.  From our travel discussions stemmed my thoughts of what other things I wanted to accomplish before I moved into a very different stage in my life.  Here are some that I’ve come up with as of February 27, 2011.

UPDATE: May 2013
I have been a proud mommy for 1 month now, and my life has changed dramatically. I absolutely love my little sweet pea. She’s sleeping nice and snugly in her baby carrier on me right now=) Can I imagine life without her? Yes, my previous life was just in the recent past.  And I do miss the freedom of being able to do things on a whim.  Everyday is unpredictable as she develops and grows. Now just even going out to dinner is a challenge, because we are still learning her behaviors and needs. Nevertheless, I am excited for my new life with B and our little S! Since my life has changed, so has my bucket list.  Instead of a bucket list of things I want to do BEFORE baby, it is now things I want to do WITH baby in tow!
So here we go!

UPDATED: June 2015

S is now a happy two year old full of personality!  She always seems to be the star of the show and really enjoys the attention.  She loves books, slides, animals, singing with her toy guitar and YouTube.  We have included her in everything that we do, opting to rarely go  anywhere without her.  She is adaptable and easy going which has allowed us to take her out to dinner-she can even sit still for most of a 2 1/2 hour dinner at a steakhouse.  It helps that she enjoys the company and food!  We have also been fortunate to travel with her too.  In her two years, she has traveled to Hawaii, Santa Barbara (twice), San Francisco (twice), Seattle/Mt Rainier, Lake Tahoe, Crystal Cove (Orange County) and Mammoth.  This included 6 roundtrip flights!  S is very chatty and speaks very well for her age.  She knows hundreds of words and can speak in full sentences, although her grammar may not be perfect!  Her newest thing is ‘talking back’ to us.  For example, Daddy will say, “You are a stinky, S!”  S will reply, “I’m not stinky, you are stinky, Daddy!”

She is such a joy and life is more complicated but much more exciting and worth living because of her.  Now the question lies of whether she should have a little brother or sister.  Haven’t made the final decision on that yet.  As happy as we are to be parents, we also want to continue on with life as well.  More to come on that!

Other notable quotes from Summer/Fall 2015:

“You don’t have no shoes on”

“How was your trip today?”

“Daddy doesn’t say no when I say please”

UPDATE: JULY 2016

I am now the proud mother of a beautiful and perfect little baby boy!  He was born in May 2016 and has completed our family.  It is amazing how one can have so much love for not just one, but two little ones!  Life in general have taken a back burner as we adjust to being parents of two.  But, we try to carve out special time just for big sister S, like kite flying and zoo dates with daddy, and story time and a movie with mommy (Finding Dory was her first theater experience).  Thankfully, big sister S is pretty understanding of what her baby brother needs, and baby brother is also a pretty good baby (who knows, maybe it’s just a little easier the second time around).  Baby E is almost 3 months old, and I cannot believe how quickly time is passing!  I’m trying to enjoy is newborn phase which is going to end before I know it!

UPDATE:  MAY 2017

Now a mother of two and still working full time, I am feeling the toll of never really having a break more than 1 hour at a time.  My days off are usually spent with E at home and toting him around to get groceries.  I try to sneak a lunch date with the hubby when he is free just to reconnect even if it’s just for that short period of time.  Looking forward to the summer when the days are longer so that we can spend more time as a family unit after work.  I love the summer outings and concerts around town.  So many opportunities for building memories and connecting.  It is especially exciting this year since S is now 4.  I have memories of when I was that age, so I am very aware that what we so will be banked into her long-term memory, perhaps for a lifetime.

FOOD

BEFORE and AFTER BABY-these haven’t changed just because little S is here.  I hope to continue to add recipes to this blog as a way to chronicle the dishes I try.  The only thing I would like to add is:

Make homemade baby food for little S I did it!  Not a bite of jarred food ever hit my babies’ lips!  Although, I do not think less of a mama who opts otherwise.

  1. Perfect my favorite dishes mom makes:  Soy sauce pork, zucchini and eggs,  Chicken with sweet sticky soy sauce, shrimp and pork with caulifower and mushroom, glazed pork slices, spicy calamari-I need to get back in the kitchen more!  Since mom and dad moved in, we have been luck enough to enjoy mom’s awesome cooking.  It has gotten even better due to her access to more Asian ingredients, more spare time, and YouTube!  Although I haven’t been cooking much, during the 2020 distance learning arrangement, I did quite a bit of baking, making recipes collected in this blog.  I also made new things with the kids including soft pretzels, homemade cream puffs, gingerbread people, and even mooncakes!
  2. Make a whole salt crusted fish
  3. Host Thanksgiving dinner : 
  4. Make the perfect batch of red velvet cupcakes
  5. Make the perfect blueberry scone
  6. Try all of the local restaurants and hometown restaurants on our ‘to try’ list-we’re actually getting there.  After we went to Addison, there are a few local spots I would like to try:  Hodad’s, The Cottage, the Greek Restaurant in our neighborhood, the Thai restaurant near the college-just to name a few.  These are all casual, so I am sure we will eventually get to these with little S…that is once she is able to stay up longer than 2 hours at a time!
  7. Eat in at least 5 times a week-That’s occurring by default!
  8. Make a new recipe at least once a week-Errr, I’m experimenting with cooking with whatever ingredients we have in the fridge.
  9. Baby E has allergies to peanuts, dairy and eggs.  It will be an adventure cooking for this little guy!

MIND

BEFORE BABY

  1. Review my academic weaknesses by actually reading my texts again!  I renewed my board certification and I’m good through 2024.

AFTER BABY

  1. Make time for myself and my relationship with B.  We need to remember who we were before baby.
  2. Make sure that B has time for himself too.  He is such a great dad who loves spending time with little S and E whenever he can, but I don’t want him to burn out with work and family.
  3. Keep connected with our friends.  We’ve automatically established a stronger bond with our friends with kids, but I don’t want to alienate those who don’t.  This is badly needed once the pandemic passes.

BODY

BEFORE BABY

  1. Exercise more regularly including yoga – Maintaining 2 times per week as of 10/2011, even through my pregnancy!

AFTER BABY

1.  The toughest part about this is finding the time.  I’ve been going to a core strengthening class once a week when B comes home.  I would still be able to make it to the class once I go back to work, but it will be at a cost of not being able to spend much time with little S that day.  Hopefully I can at least keep up a 2 days/week schedule for exercise.  It could be something B and I do together! —  An update June 2015, I maintained going to work out once a week for a year! Then in May 2014, I stopped completely for about 4 months, then started going to hot yoga 2-4 times a month.  Now, it’s Jun 2015 I’ve been in another lull.  I’m hoping to restart very very soon.  I’ve got my gym membership purchased-just need to activate it!

By July 2015, I was back in the gym regularly and feeling much better about myself.  By August, I did the Whole 30 Challenge (but for only 2 weeks!).  My body was feeling good, and ready…for baby #2!

I continued to workout during my second pregnancy.  Once I started maternity leave at 35 weeks, I was at the gym 3 days a week doing Pilates Fusion, Piyo Strength and Cycling.

I’ve been slow to restarting my workouts post-baby #2.  He is now almost 4 months old, and I think I’ve gone to the gym perhaps four times.  Hopefully once we get the hang of caring for 2 kids at once, I will feel less guilty for stepping away to the gym.

May 2017 E is already 1, and I’m starting to gain more energy as he starts to sleep in a bit. Such a huge difference between 5:00 and 5:45.  I’ve started taking hot yoga again, hoping to strengthen my core, and kickboxing.  I am currently taking the Whole 30 Challenge this month along with my sister and co-workers to try to jumpstart the fat shedding now that I’m starting to cut back on nursing.  Although I’m just under my pre-pregnancy weight of 108lb, my body composition is not the same, and I’ve probably lost muscle weight.  I’m not really trying to lose weight, but trying to feel a little bit more confident and happy.  I know that your size should not affect how you feel about yourself, but being petite has always been a part of my identity, whether right or wrong.

I have been indulging in monthly massages which I believed has helped a bit with the tight shoulders and back

March 2020  I am happy to report that I’ve finally gotten into a more consistent routine with exercise.  Joining a boutique gym membership, going to yoga with friends and taking a jog while waiting for S at her activities has really helped tremendously.  It’s almost a given that I will be working out on my days off, and it is feeling strange not to have some sort of physical activity most days.

January 2022  I’ve managed to ride the fitness train through the pandemic (although we are not on the other side of that yet)!  I managed to work out at home with instructors holding class over YouTube, and actually had more time for myself as I did not have any carpooling to do!  I feel and look stronger.  Gone are my skinny pre-baby limbs, now replaced with strong mama arms and shoulders.  My endurance has improved incredibly.  I am faster than ever too!  Can’t believe that I’m at a point where it feels weird to not work out for  three straight days!  I am toying with the idea of entering a race, just for the challenge, although I do not think that I am mentally prepared for the time commitment.  For now, I will try to run at least three days a week and increase my distances.  Maybe to 5 miles at a time.  3.5 is about my max tolerance at the moment.

Yoga has been an increasing interest of mine.  I love the heat, the relaxation as well as the mental challenge of holding poses.  During the pandemic, I learned how to do a headstand and a few arm balances.  I really need to work on my back flexibility, which has declining since my back ‘injury’.  I am not able to get into those cool poses that required the deep back flexibility.  I also want to get into the splits again, conquer the hand stand, chin stand, compass pose and crow to plan transition.

PERSONAL

  1. Complete my wedding album-yes, still need to do this,  At least I’ve contacted our photographer to get started on it!
  2. Finish my bridesmaid gifts (1 done, 4 to go!) (4 done, 1 to go!)
  3. Finish my wedding scrapbook.  I have a feeling this will take awhile to get
  4. Complete a living will and trust Completed 4/2014
  5. Read for pleasure more-Joined the preschool mom’s book club starting with Hannah’s ‘The Nightingale’ in July 2016.  It is now May 2017, and I’ve read one other book and started 3 others.  The progress is slow, but at least I’m trying!  Just need to have some more free time!  March 2020: I was doing pretty well last year, reading a book about every month, but have fallen off that wagon again.  I did purchase a few interesting looking books from the library, so perhaps re-reading this post will inspire me.  I think part of the reason I’m not reading as much is because I’ve gotten into doing the New York Times crossword puzzle.  I’m usually trying to solve them during my downtime right before bed.  I’ve managed to teach myself how to solve most Monday and Tuesday puzzles, and I’m able to get through a fair amount of Wednesday puzzles too (they get more difficult as the weeks progresses, with Sunday’s being the most challenging).  Fast forward to 2022.  Still spending time doing the NYT crossword, getting better at completing Wednesday and Sunday puzzles!  Haven’t read any of those books I purchased from the library back in 2020, but hey, there’s still time!  I have told S that I want to read Harry Potter, and I want to set a better example for my kids.  S is starting to interest in reading, and E is just starting.  This is a perfect time to stick my nose in a book!
  6. Take better care of my skin-While on maternity leave for baby #2, I did some research and did a complete overhaul of my skincare regimen.  It was also once greasy once I put my products on, which looked bad in photos with major shine by late day.  My once dry skin is now more supple and smooth without the greasy products.  The product also provide defense against aging signs.  Pretty happy with the results thus far.  I’m not expecting to turn back time too much, but no reason to not try our best!
  7. Travel often.  Travel brings perspective, appreciation and self-discovery.  It is also a time for quality family time.  I truly understand why parent drag their kids onto family vacations after we went to Kauai in April 2017.  I felt that I really needed to spend the quality time with the family without the distractions of everyday life.  We all had a great time, made wonderful memories, and I felt that I got to know my little one better.  Recently I had been feeling like I wasn’t seeing him much.  Between work, driving S to swim twice a week and his early bedtime, it left very few hours to spend quality time with him.  We definitely saw a change in little E while we were there.  He had just learned to walk.  He practiced his new freedom in the beautiful home we rented on the island.  You could see his pure joy.  I think that he grew up a lot, his personality started to come through and he started to  engage with us more as we spent the entire week together.  Such an awesome transformation to see!  March 2020:  We have been traveling a fair amount the past few years, but nothing exotic or far-reaching.  We had another fun trip to Maui where little S was a beach babe hanging out on a paddle board with B and uncle M.  The kids saw snow for the first time on a trip to Aspen and other parts of Colorado in 2017.  Although the snow was unexpected and changed our travel plans, it was a great surprise for the kids who made a snowman on the porch of our condo.  We spent a long weekend in Mammoth in the summer seeing some of the farther fetched areas in California. We had a trip to the Bay Area including Monterrey, but we will have to go back since the kids were fast asleep by the time we crossed the Golden Gate Bridge.  But among all the travels, I’m sure that S and E’s favorite was our family trip to Disneyland! 2022:  Last year during the pandemic, everyone, including us, were heading to the National Parks.  In 2021, we managed to see Joshua Tree, Zion, Bryce Canyon, Yellowstone/Tetons, Sequoias, Kings Canyon, Yosemite.  We also squeezed in a ski trip at Brianhead via Las Vegas.  I am excited to report that S has been bitten my the hiking bug.  We hiked iconic trails including Vernal Falls, Taft Point and Sentinel Dome.  It was at Yosemite where S realized her love for hiking and adventure.  She also enjoyed hiking at Kings Canyon.  Another family activity the kids enjoyed was biking at Zion (gorgeous!) and Yosemite.  E had learned to ride a bike just in time for our Yosemite trip.  So exciting to see him bike in such a beautiful setting.  Paddleboarding is also a favorite pastime of the family.  I hope that our next big adventures include some international travel.  Thailand, Malaysia, Japan, Australia, New Zealand, Iceland and Banff are still on the top of my list.  I certainly want to take the kids to China once E’s Mandarin is up and running

AFTER BABY

1. In addition to those listed above, I want to keep up with the photos/scrapbooking for little S’s first year.  I have also tried to jot down thoughts and little events in a journal so that I can remember this time in her life.  It’s all starting to blur together.  I just want something that I can look back at.

2. Start saving and investing for the college fund

HOME

  1. Furnish our outdoor living area Patio table added Summer 2011, but would like to clean up our garden.  I’d also like an outdoor sofa set that is more comfortable and inviting than the furniture that we have now.
  2. Create a more kid friendly play area outside-swing set where our old tree was, use the upstairs deck.
  3. Clear out unwanted items from my old condo-just a few miscellaneous things are still lingering
  4. Organize our finances
  5. Track our spending and earnings, now that baby is here
  6. Set up an estate and will Started 2014 but needs updating since the birth of Baby E in 2016
  7. Buy a new computerCompleted 10/2011
  8. Upgrade my camera Completed by B 3/2011
  9. Devise a regular cleaning schedule for the house Forget about this-we’re getting a housekeeper!
  10. Buy a new car Completed 2/2012
  11. Organize and declutter so that everything we own has a designated storage space – working on this a little at a time.  Always a work in progress!

BABY- I am retiring this list as of May 2017 since I don’t have babies in the house anymore :0

  1. Make sure that little S is happy, eating well and thriving
  2. Hope that she doesn’t develop stranger anxiety to a point where she is not nice to our friends – Stella almost had the opposite of stranger anxiety.  She is a little ham and loves attention from others.  Now at 2 years old, she is very chatty and does really well meeting new adults, going to restaurants and traveling.  She has been like this every once she overcame her constant crying which lasted for about 6 weeks.
  3. Figure out her child care situation once she’s a little older – She is a happy preschooler at a very laid-back but nurturing center.  Baby E will have out Auntie and then attend S’s day care
  4. Ensure that she continues to sleep through the night! – Going strong for 2 years!
  5. Ensure that she is an independent and confident individual

FOR BABY #2-Retired List

  1. Make sure that he is thriving and happy
  2. Ensure that he sleeps through the night

FOR BOTH OF MY LITTLE ONES

Ensure that they know act appropriately and respect their elders and peers. I make it a point for them to acknowledge everyone in the room when they enter and leave.  I also want to teach E how to treat a lady.  I plan to have mother daughter dates with him when he gets older.

Learn self sufficiency that is age appropriate.  S helps out by throwing things away.  She now puts away her used dishes in the sink and washes her hands after every meal.  She is getting better at putting things away after she is done with them.  She also like to help me prepare meals.  She is not a big cleaner, but we will work on it.  She probably gets that from her mother!

Help them understand where there family came from.  I plan to take then to the mother land soon and as often as it is feasible…probably tagging another destination onto each trip.

Help them tap into their generosity, compassion and to help them realize the joy of giving

Instill humility, modesty, responsibility

Help them find their true calling, embrace strengths and accept and improve upon their weaknesses

Spend individual time with my little ones, that goes for daddy too!  I would love to take little S to a tea house or a ballet and bring E to the library and the park

Teach them that feeling uncomfortable or unsure is OK.  Succeeding isn’t everything.  It’s more about the journey.

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